Introduction to South Hill designs MLM Compensation Plan
Think about the times when someone has described you as an optimist or a pessimist. Unless you have only every shown anyone a very small, and perhaps very calculated, facet of your personality, you have probably been described as both. It may very well be the case that some people are pure introverts and some are pure extroverts (although there are probably more people who are somewhere in the middle than there are people who are firmly at one or the other end of the spectrum), but almost no one is purely optimistic or purely pessimistic.
At one point during my quest to become the world’s most knowledgeable college dropout, I tried to read Candide: Or Optimism by Voltaire. Candide is a satirical novel about 18th century France; it describes, in an exaggerated and sometimes intentionally absurd way, what we would now refer to as the circumstances that led to the French Revolution. (The book was written in 1759, three decades before the revolution.) Have you ever watched a movie or situation comedy from the 70s or earlier and noticed how most of the jokes haven’t aged well, that the family dynamics and relationships among neighbors and co-workers do not resemble anything you have ever experienced? Better yet, have you ever watched old Looney Tunes cartoons? The cartoons made in the 1950s and earlier are full of then-current pop culture references and celebrity catchphrases that, today, make no sense at all. Even once the content that is too racist for today’s audiences has been removed, the jokes seem stale when we even recognize that they were supposed to be jokes. In fact, unless you are especially well versed in the history of film and animation, it is hard to understand their original appeal. So imagine what it is like to read something that was written over 250 and is translated from another language. I am sure that most of Candide went over my head, even after I read the footnotes. Two things about the book have stuck in my mind, however. The first is the exaggerated descriptions of the luxury in which Candide lived his early life, and the second is how clearly Voltaire made his point that the unflinching optimism through which Candide’s teacher, Professor Pangloss, sees the world, is meant to appear ridiculous to the reader.
In real life, no one is as optimistic as Professor Pangloss. I have been accused of being optimistic to a fault, and I have also been described as a grouch on more than one occasion, and not just by people who were trying to get in the way of my plans to sit on my keister all winter. I take reasons to be glad wherever I can find them. For example, I am currently in the midst of a quest to review as many multilevel marketing (MLM) business opportunities as I can, and so many of them revolve around the sale of nutritional supplements. Now, you don’t have to read very far into any Notebook Crazy post to find out how much I hate businesses that require you to have big boxes of vitamins and protein powder shipped to your address at your own expense so that they can take up room in their basement. (See, there’s that grouch I was telling you about.) Of course, the optimist in me finds reason to rejoice, because this South Hill Designs review marks the third day in a row when I have reviewed an MLM company that has nothing whatsoever to do with nutritional supplements. I choose to focus on that instead of on the dozens of nutraceutical MLMs I have previously reviewed and the many others that are still out there waiting for me to review them. Of course, the pessimist in me tempers my happiness about writing this South Hill Designs review, because I only had to read a few other South Hill Designs reviews to find out that South Hill Designs uses a “home party” business model to sell its costume jewelry, and I hate MLM home sales parties more than I hate just about anything else I can think of. In fact, the word “hate” is not even strong enough to describe how I feel about MLM home sales parties. The only phrase that can describe it, as all loyal readers of Notebook Crazy know, is “quadruple crown diamond barf.”
Yesterday, I reviewed Mary Kay, which also operates on the home sales party model, and today I am writing my South Hill Designs review, where there are even more home sales parties, so that means quadruple crown diamond barf quadruple crown diamond barf. If I let the grouch in me win, I would spend the rest of this South Hill Designs review harrumphing about how much I hate MLM home sales parties, which actually kind of sounds like fun. (For more on this subject, Google “Grouch’s paradox.” Thanks to the wonders of SEO, it will lead you back to another MLM review I wrote here on Notebook Crazy.) Of course, then the optimist kicks in, and I remember that at least Karatbars, the MLM company I reviewed two days ago, does not operate through home sales parties. If you read that review, you will know that Karatbars sells very small amounts of gold. Having a pirate themed party where your guests go on a treasure hunt looking for one gram of gold here, five grams of gold there, actually does sound like fun. In fact, it sounds like the second most fun MLM party after the way I imagine a Healthy Headie home party being, where, I presume, everyone gets the munchies.
South Hill Designs: The Company and Its Products
South Hill Designs products take the form of a considerable variety of costume jewelry pieces, many of which can be customized. They are most well known for their floating charm lockets, although their product line also includes quite a few other pieces, such as essential oil lockets. South Hill Designs was founded in 2012, a year after the founding of its fellow charm locket MLM company Origami Owl, which I have also reviewed here on this site. Numerous Origami Owl distributors and more than a few South Hill Designs reviewers have alleged that South Hill Designs products are an imitation, some might say a rip off, of Origami Owl’s flagship products, and this was an issue in the Origami Owl vs. South Hill Designs lawsuit a few years ago. South Hill Designs reviewers have also made a big deal of the fact that the founder of South Hill Designs, Joe Ochoa and Brian Palmer, are both dudes, but I don’t think that is such a surprise. No one is surprised about Calvin Klein, Oscar de la Renta, and Versace designing fashions for women, so why is it so weird that two men would found a company that sells costume jewelry for women?
How much it costs to join the South Hill Design business opportunity depends on which starter package you buy; all the starter packages provide you with your own South Hill Designs website for one month. (The South Hill Designs reviews and official South Hill Designs website do not clearly state this, but I have inferred that, after the first month, you the South hill distributor are responsible for the cost of your South Hill Designs website.)
The South Hill Designs Compensation Plan
As usually tends to be the case in the MLM industry, the South Hill Designs compensation plan provides the opportunity to make money through the sale of South Hill Designs products and from “team volume” (the sales you have made and the sales members of your downline sales team have made). When it comes to your own personal sale of South Hill Designs products, the commissions range from 20% to 40%. Additionally, you can get a commission of between 4% and 12% of your team’s sale of South Hill Designs products. As for recruitment of new South Hill Designs distributor, the bonuses are big, but they are not particularly easy to achieve. You don’t get bonuses just for signing people up, because anyone can pressure their family members into signing up for an MLM opportunity, only to have them drop out before making any big sales. Rather, every time someone you recruit sells her first $1,000 worth of South Hill Designs products, you get a $100 bonus. If you have every dealt with MLM before, you know how much work it is to stay on people’s cases about not dropping out of an MLM company. You will have to spend well over 10 hours making phone calls and writing emails to help your recruit stay motivated to keep selling South Hill Designs products (and, most likely, keep buying them at her own expense), which means that all that work will have gotten you less than $10 per hour. Of course, at the higher levels of leadership there are bigger bonuses and even vacations, but that happens in a lot of MLMs and isn’t really something that makes the South Hill Designs compensation plan unique.
Advantages and Disadvantages
- South Hill Designs products are not nutraceuticals.
- South Hill Designs products do not contain fungus or plankton. If there are any South Hill Designs products that contain holograms, only the boldest of South Hill Designs distributors would ever try to convince you that these holograms will cure your aches and pains.
- It is quite entertaining to read about the Origami Owl vs. South Hill Designs feud. If you have already run out of stuff to read about the East Coast vs. West Coast feud in 90s hip hop, the Thomas Jefferson vs. Alexander Hamilton feud in early U.S. history, and the pink pigs vs. Pink Floyd feud of the 1980s (which you can read about on this very site), I highly recommend it.
- I can only think of a few scenarios in which it is possible to sell enough lockets to grown women that you turn a profit, and each one is more unpleasant than the last. You can sell them to women who are so lonely that they will buy your friendship for the price of an overpriced locket. You can sell them to women who are so reactionary in their views that they think that all women should wear lockets, as indeed many of them did before First Wave Feminism went and messed everything up. You can sell them to women whose financial behaviors are dictated by female relatives whose ages are in the single digits. Even if you could do these things, I have a hard time imagining why you would want to.
- Costume jewelry is about as frivolous a consumer item as you can get. MLM in general is not recession proof, but this description really applies to MLM companies like South Hill Designs, which sell products that are just for fun. Perhaps Karatbars seeks to profit from people who worry too much about the next recession, but South Hill Designs seeks to profit from people who worry too little about it.
- South Hill Designs distributors are encouraged, maybe even expected, to host MLM sales parties in their homes. I’ve said it before on Notebook Crazy, and I’ll say it again. Quadruple crown diamond barf.
There is a lot of talk in the news recently about reforming math education to teach more practical math skill and less higher math that is only needed for very specialized professions. When I read MLM compensation plans like the South Hill Designs compensation plan, I can see where the math education reformers are coming from. Do people who join MM companies really think about how many hours of work go into the money they earn, especially when they take into consideration the money they put into sustaining their MLM business. I’ll be the first to admit that long division isn’t fun, but it’s a lot more fun than getting yourself deeper and deeper in debt chasing yet another MLM business opportunity.
Did you ever try to read a classic work of literature as an adult? How did it go? Schedule a call with me, and we will compare notes on the state of being a self-employed autodidact.