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CieAura MLM Compensation Plan Review 2.0

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Introduction to CieAura MLM Compensation Plan

What do you think of when you hear the word “aura”?  Nothing good, I imagine.  The only scientifically accepted use of the word “aura” is to refer to the visual disturbances experienced by some migraine sufferers before the headache phase of the migraine episode begins.  An aura is not something you want to see.  Other than that, the word gets bandied about in pseudoscientific contexts by people with varying degrees of ulterior motives.  Many people, especially women, have been told that they have an aura of a certain color.  In certain contexts, the alleged beholder of the aura tends to be a scuzzy guy in a bar who, stinking of beer and cigarettes, shouts in your ear, over the music of the jukebox, that your aura matches the color of the lava lamp in his room.  In other contexts, the person who claims to see your aura tends to be a woman you meet at belly dancing class who, despite how much she talks about how much self-confidence she has, seems awfully emotionally needy.  She tends to have so little imagination that the color of your aura always seems to match the color of the clothing you are wearing.  You do not want to see an aura, nor do you want anyone to see yours.

Holograms, on the other hand, are a lot of fun to see.  Unlike a photograph, a hologram can only be seen under certain conditions; it cannot usually be seen in natural light.  Its effects can be truly amazing, however.  If you look at the hologram image of a mouse munching on a flower on the Wikipedia page on holography, you would never know that it was not just a photograph of a nocturnal mouse taken in red light if it were not on a Wikipedia page specifically about holograms.  The best place to see holograms is at the planetarium.  I remember in the 90s, when I was in high school, there was a Pink Floyd laser light show at my local planetarium.  It started at about 10:00 at night, and it was one of the first times I drove anywhere by myself.  I had just gotten my driver’s license.  I borrowed my dad’s car and drove off, knowing that if I brought in back in one piece, my dad’s trust in me would have been well placed.

I had only been to the planetarium a few times before, always on school field trips.  On the way in, it always smelled like too many schoolchildren in one place, all of them on their best behavior, knowing that going to the planetarium was a special occasion.  It was always a disappointment to have assigned seats at the planetarium.  You always got seated next to the kid who picks his nose or the tattletale who bears false witness against everyone, but when the lights went down and the stars came out, you forgot everything.  Stars on the ceiling of the planetarium became constellations illuminated by connect the dots laser lights became holograms of the beings from Greek mythology that they were supposed to represent.  I couldn’t help but think that Cassiopeia got a raw deal.

But the planetarium shows that you see on elementary school field trips are designed within lots of restrictions.  They have to fit in with the school curriculum, and if you think that means the rules were strict in the 80s, I can’t imagine how little fun elementary school planetarium shows are now.  The stars probably just sit there and blink about how you should eat organic vegetables.  Mars has probably been edited out of the show because it is too belligerent.  And don’t even ask me about Pluto.  The Pink Floyd laser light show at the planetarium, on the other hand, had no other purpose than to bring the music of Pink Floyd to life.  And did it ever.  The pathos, the hubris, all those things that the ancient Greeks and all the other ancient peoples of the world had seen written into the stars, those things that Syd Barrett saw during his first acid trip, when he held up an orange and a plum and said that they were Jupiter and Venus, but which he was never able to put into words again, all Roger Waters’ decades-long sadness over Syd Barrett’s aforementioned silence, Alan Parsons’ attempts to be the audio equivalent of Stanley Kubrick, the fall of Icarus.  The madness and the melancholy floated off the ceiling in dazzling holograms.  Everyone else in the room felt it too.  The audience was 90% male, weird dudes who had had email addresses since before America Online was a thing and their sons who were about my age.  Their weirdness and the weirdness of the music mingled in the air-conditioned air in green and red and purple holograms in the shape of everything and nothing.  It must have been what 25-year-old Pete Townshend had in mind for the Lifehouseproject before it collapsed under its own weight.  If Pete Townshend had been able to get his hands on some holograms, perhaps it all would have turned out differently, and we never would have had Who’s Next, leaving Pink Floyd’s Dark Side of the Moon as rock music’s only major label attempt to stick it to Stanley Kubrick.  I had been watching commercials on TV about how the McDonald’s drive thru stayed open after midnight, and I had been looking forward for weeks to passing through the drive thru after the Pink Floyd planetarium show, but by the time the show was over, I had forgotten all about the drive thru.  I went straight home, straight to the computer room, and starting typing what became the first article on my classic rock blog, not that the word blog existed back then.  The next time my best friend the other Brad, the one who now runs this site with me, saw me, he didn’t know what had gotten into me.

Whatever got into me that night, it’s still here.  The desire to see the sides of life that only come out at night, that only come to town once in a lifetime, is still here.  The 9 to 5 lifestyle has never been for me.  That’s how I got started with multi-level marketing (MLM).  It is not easy to make a living through MLM, but life is never boring.  These days, I am in the process of reviewing every MLM company I can find, and I can tell you in no uncertain terms that the company I am reviewing today, CieAura, stands out from the crowd.

CieAura and Its Products

CieAura’s flagship product is a series of patches you apply to the skin in the hopes of treating ailments ranging from allergies to insomnia, decreased libido, and good old-fashioned sloth.  They allegedly achieve this through the use of holograms; CieAura’s website describes them as “revolutionary technology that communicates with the body.”  There are different products geared toward different ailments.  CieAura Pure Relief Patches allegedly make a mini Pink Floyd planetarium show on your boo-boo that makes the pain go away.  Body Revolution patches purport to reduce food cravings the way that nicotine patches reduce nicotine cravings, with the important difference that Body Revolution patches do not contain food.  Holograms can do a lot of things.  For example, they can make driver’s licenses that are very hard to counterfeit, meaning that the fake ID industry that is currently burgeoning in every freshman dorm in the US will need to step up its game.  They can even make certain molecules, includes one important for medical diagnosis, easier to see under a microscope.  What they cannot do is cure allergies and depression through a patch worn on the skin.  There is no way to put this delicately.  CieAura Chips are nicotine patches without the nicotine.  I thought I had seen everything when I found of about the Amega AM Wand that supposedly cures an array of illnesses by making your cytoplasm dance itself into a state of bliss.  But at least the Amega people had the decency only to ask you to buy one wand to cure all your ills.

The Science page of the CieAura website compares the CieAura Chips’ mechanism of action to acupuncture and acupressure, but I am still incredulous.  How much pressure can a stick-on bandage actually apply?  There is a reason that when you get a blood test, the nurse asks you to hold a cotton ball over the puncture site and apply pressure to it for a little while before she puts a Band-Aid on it.  The Band-Aid isn’t going to do it by itself.

CieAura Compensation Plan

The CieAura Compensation Plan offers eight different ways to make money.  It emphasizes at the beginning of the CieAura Compensation Plan that the main draw of CieAura is its products.  Its Independent Retailers are encouraged to give out free samples of CieAura Chips; that is how sure the CieAura people are that the customers will come back for more.  In any case, the eight ways to make money in the CieAura Compensation Plan are as follows:

  • Retail Profits -These are the difference between the wholesale and retail prices of the CieAura Products you sell.
  • Preferred Customer Points – You get additional commissions when your customers sign up as Preferred Customers.
  • First Order Commissions – You earn this commission every time you sponsor a new Independent Retailer.
  • Team Sales Commissions – These are commissions you make from the sales made by your downline (the people you sponsor and the people they sponsor).
  • Seven-Level Unlimited Matching Bonuses – These bonuses, also based on seven levels of your downline sales, are available to Independent Retailers who have achieved the rank of Active Four Star Retailer or higher.
  • Focus on Four Star Bonus – This one-time bonus is based on how many new retailers you sponsor in your first 30 days after achieving Active Four Star Retailer status.
  • Top 10 Monthly Bonus – You get this bonus if your sales are in the top ten of all Independent Retailers in the company. The bonus is given to the top ten sellers for each month.
  • Leadership Bonuses – There are lots of different ones, and they get bigger as your rank increases.

The leadership levels in the CieAura Compensation Plan are Four Star, Five Star, Silver Star, Gold Star, Ambassador, Diamond, Double Diamond, Triple Diamond, Black Diamond, and Crown Black Diamond.

Advantages and Disadvantages

Advantages

  • You can choose to sell CieAura products in person or online. If you sell them online, at least you won’t have to look the customers in the eye.
  • Holograms are really cool, and they do have applications in the medical industry, just not the way that CieAura thinks they do.
  • If you feel like wearing a Band-Aid but aren’t injured or feel like wearing a nicotine patch but have never smoked a cigarette in your life, it’s CieAura chips to the rescue.
  • There has to be someone out there who has very powerful placebo receptors on their skin. Maybe you can sell CieAura Chips to the woman at belly dancing class who claims that she can see your aura.
  • At least CieAura isn’t just like every other MLM company out there that sells outrageously overpriced equivalents of Centrum Silver, Slim Fast, and Windex.

Disadvantages

  • If the people at CieAura were as creative with the names of their leadership levels as they were with rationalizing how their products work, it might be a lot of fun to work for this company.
  • CieAura chips are a lot more expensive than Band-Aids, and they work about as well at curing allergies and insomnia.

Conclusion

I’m speechless.  Not the kind of speechless I was during the Pink Floyd planetarium show, the other kind of speechless.

 

By the time you read this, I will no longer be speechless.  I will, in fact, have returned to my usual state of being full of advice about the MLM industry.  If you would like to hear my advice, give me a call.

 

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