Introduction to Iguana Biz MLM Compensation Plan
The ostensible purpose of my blog, Notebook Crazy, is to review multilevel marketing (MLM) business opportunities, but for some reason I always find myself returning instead to the subject of reptiles. One reason is that both reptile species and MLM companies tend to thrive in the state of Florida, whether or not they originated there. Another is that, after a while, it is just less depressing to write about reptiles than it is to write about MLM. Reptiles may be a little creepy, but they do not intentionally ruin your finances. If an alligator or Nile monitor lizard (those have arrived in Florida, you know) eats your family pet, it was only doing so out of a biological need for food. It does not swim up to your house on the first day of every month and demand that you feed it another teacup Yorkie, unlike MLM companies, with their monthly membership fees and their autoship requirements. In fact, if one pet that belongs to you gets eaten by an alligator, that is usually all it takes to convince you to get out of Florida, but MLM companies are much sneakier than the alligators that lurk in canals in residential neighborhoods. MLMs keep giving you all this rhetoric about financial freedom through the sale of supposedly irresistible products, sometimes described in glossy compensation plan documents, when what they really mean is “chomp”. At least alligators are honest.
Once you get onto the subject of reptiles that easily adapt to the MLM-friendly climate in Florida, you discover that there are so many of them. Most of them were introduced by way of the pet trade; that is another one of Florida’s quirks. Not only do people in Florida seem to think that the way to achieve financial stability is by selling goji berry juice and plankton pills to your neighbors, but they also consider reptiles desirable pets. First, it was the iguanas. If you have ever seen an iguana in the Midwest, it was probably at a climate controlled reptile exhibit at a zoo, but in Florida, having a pet iguana seems to be a rite of passage. I have previously discussed on this site how there is a great possibility that even a casual visitor to Florida, such as a Midwesterner attending an MLM convention, might see an iguana lounging in a tree or running through the tall grass beside a strip mall and diving into a man-made lake, and although this is my Iguana Biz review, the iguana is only one of many reptiles from far-flung places to have gotten comfy in Florida. And I’m not talking about the little ones, the green anoles that, while they add an accent of color to the concrete wall where they are hanging out, do not really frighten anyone who is old enough to ride Space Mountain or the Tower of Terror. I mean the Nile monitor lizards, those carnivorous creatures that look like a much sleeker and more versatile version of the Komodo dragon. The Komodo dragon is an Apple IIe to a Nile monitor’s MacBook Air, and the Nile monitor, on account of being so quick and sure footed that you will never hear it coming, as well as on account of its taste for reptile eggs, is a potential threat to the American alligator. But the story gets even better.
Today, when I turned on my computer to write this Iguana Biz review, I checked the news headlines, like I always do, and I found out that the American alligator has yet another threat, and it comes from the same continent, and in fact the very same river, as the Nile monitor lizard. This is not my first time writing about the Nile crocodile on this blog. Early in my quest to review every MLM business opportunity out there, I contrasted the vicious Nile crocodile with its much cuddlier lookalike cousin the West African crocodile, which was domesticated at a temple in Faiyum, Egypt in Pharaonic times and the harmless demeanor of which is a tourist attraction at several lakes in Burkina Faso and northern Ghana. Most crocodilians feed mostly on fish and crustaceans, and the Nile crocodile will eat these if nothing else is available, but if given the opportunity, it will lurk just below the surface of a river, saving its appetite for when a herd of zebras or wildebeest decides to cross; then it will strike t just the right moment. The Nile crocodile can weigh as much as 1,600 pounds, and adult male Nile crocodiles have been known to eat half their body weight in a single meal. In some parts on Africa, Nile crocodiles have been known to prey on domestic cattle that were grazing near a river.
In the past eight years, three Nile crocodiles have been captured in Florida, and there may be more of them out there; all three of them were found, in different years, near Homestead, Florida, which is south of Miami. There are plenty of reasons to be afraid. First, in terms of the number of humans killed, the Nile crocodile is the second scariest reptile on earth; only the saltwater crocodile, which lives in northern Australia and the surrounding area, kills more people. Both species of crocodiles have displayed behavior that makes it look as though they are actively hunting humans, and both of them are huge. But the reasons for being disturbed by the Nile crocodile’s presence in Florida go beyond the simple fact that it is a big, scary monster.
The southernmost part of Florida, the part south of Miami, is home to the very endangered American crocodile. This skittish, mostly pescetarian creature is already threatened by habitat loss and by the larger American alligator, with which it shares an ecosystem. The presence of the Nile crocodile in South Florida could spell disaster for the American crocodile. The two types of crocodiles are genetically similar enough that they could interbreed, and while that might increase the population of American crocodiles, with enough admixture of Nile crocodile genes, they could cease to be a distinct species. The bigger threat, though, is that the American crocodile could just become brunch for the Nile crocodile, since Nile crocodiles have been known to eat smaller Nile crocodiles in Africa.
And then there is the question of how the Nile crocodile even ended up in South Florida in the first place. It probably originally entered through the exotic pet trade. (I am not sure whether it is legal to keep Nile crocodiles as pets in Florida or whether whoever imported a baby Nile crocodile just tried to pass it off as an ill-tempered caiman.) But no one is sure how it got from someone’s backyard in extreme southern Florida to the Everglades swamp. It could have escaped; it is very easy for animals accustomed to slithering to slither out from their enclosures into a canal that leads to the Everglades. It is also possible that someone deliberately took Nile crocodiles to the Everglades just to see how big they would get and how they would interact with all the other introduced reptile species.
Yes, Florida has lots of creepy reptiles and lots of creepier MLM rhetoric. Know what else has lots of creepy reptiles and lots of creepier MLM rhetoric? The Iguana Biz website.
Iguana Biz: The Company and Its Products
The Iguana Biz website alludes to the fact that the Iguana Biz business opportunity was named mostly as a marketing gimmick, and the Iguana Biz reviews I read while researching this Iguana Biz review echoed that sentiment. The Iguana Biz website features a cartoon iguana saying “It’s a jungle out there”, as well as a cartoon alligator with a bib, purporting to “eat the competition alive”.
The Iguana Biz business opportunity includes two sets of Iguana Biz products. The first category of products is a set of business tools, including pre-written capture pages and pre-written auto responder messages. This product package also includes landing pages, thank you pages, and banners, as well as an ad tracker, a contact manager, and templates for advertising materials. Plus, there are things like an income journal and a weekly planner, the kinds of business tools that tend to be given out as freebies at corporate events. And then there are the training materials. Those of you who have experience in the MLM industry probably felt a chill down your spine when you read the phrase “training materials”, because you know how goofy and unhelpful MLM training materials are, except to the people making a profit by selling them. The other aspect of the Iguana Biz products is something called the Savings Ultimate Travel Card. It reportedly gets you discounts on travel, lodging, and things that you buy on an ordinary basis. I have seen plenty of these discount club MLMs in my day, and it is not a viable business model, especially not in the age of the Internet. These days, all kinds of discounts are only a click away, and you do not have to pay membership fees to get them.
The Iguana Biz Compensation Plan
What I can say in defense of the Iguana Biz business opportunity is that there is a tab on the Iguana Biz website dedicated to the Iguana Biz compensation plan. I can also confidently say that the Iguana Biz compensation plan does not promise endless residual income based on commissions from downline sales, nor does it include bonus pools for people who have reached leadership ranks that contain the word “diamond”. It claims that if you recruit three people, who each recruit three, who each recruit three, you get a $512 bonus. As always, that is a lot easier said than done. As long as everyone in your downline team continues to participate in the Iguana Biz business opportunity, you get a payout of this bonus every single month.
Advantages and Disadvantages
- I do enjoy the cartoon reptiles and amphibians on the Iguana Biz website, especially the mobile site. They look like something I would draw if I had any drawing talent.
- Iguana Biz products are not nutraceuticals, so no one is claiming that they cure cancer.
- Iguana Biz products are not costume jewelry, although iguana themed costume jewelry does sound like it might be kind of cool.
- I guess the rainstorm sound effects do fit the Floridian theme of the Iguana Biz website, but the fact that you cannot turn them off is rather annoying. Thus, keeping a tab on my computer open to the Iguana Biz website while writing this Iguana Biz review means turning my whole computer off.
- I am inclined to think that Iguana Biz products are nothing special. As Iguana Biz reviewers have pointed out, one size fits all business websites and auto responder messages have to be pretty basic and nowhere near as useful to your business as what you could get if you paid someone to design a website specifically for your business. Some of the business tools are things that are included free with a free Google account. This tends to be the case with business tools sold through an MLM business model.
The Iguana Biz business opportunity is just another business tools MLM combined with just another discount club MLM. Neither of these types of MLM are reliable for making money; of course, neither are the nutraceutical ones or the costume jewelry ones. While I like the fact that the Iguana Biz business opportunity has a reptile theme, there is really nothing else that stands out. You would get more entertainment out of your money if you went to Florida to photograph feral iguanas, Nile monitor lizards, and perhaps Nile crocodiles.
Want to know how to tell the difference between an alligator and a crocodile? You can find out in a single Google search. Want to know how to build a successful Internet business? Schedule a call with me, and I will tell you.