Introduction to Partylite MLM Compensation Plan
Welcome back to Notebook Crazy, the thinking man’s multilevel marketing (MLM) review blog. Today I am reviewing the Partylite business opportunity, and when I found out that Partylite products are candles, I decided that I would begin my Partylite review with a discussion of famous movie scenes featuring candles. I thought back to when my class read Shakespeare’s Othello in high school, and we watched a movie version of the play. The movie starred Laurence Fishburne as Othello, and it was fairly new while I was in high school. Thanks to my blog, Classic Rock Ragnarok, that kept me awake most nights during my last two years of high school, I was rarely alert during school hours, so I probably zoned out for most of the Othello movie, but I still remember the scene at the beginning, where Othello carries his bride Desdemona over the threshold into a room full of huge candlesticks.
As grouchy as I may come across in some of these MLM reviews (I have a hair trigger temper about things like autoship and stair step breakaway compensation plans, not to mention a hair trigger gag reflex about MLM home sales parties), I really enjoy researching my reviews. I was sure that reading about famous cinematic candles for my Partylite review was going to be a lot of fun. I imagined that I would find all kinds of lists, lovingly crafted by movie nerds, describing the awesome candles in movies that take place before the invention of the electric lightbulb, as well as candles used to make horror movies even more suspenseful. I hoped that the blogosphere would jog my memory about candles in Amadeus, Gangs of New York, and The Exorcist. Were there candles during the scene where in Psycho where Marion Crane dines with Norman Bates in the Bates Motel, and the audience is left not knowing which character is creepier? To my disappointment, almost every entry on the first few pages of search results was about the movie Sixteen Candles. This fact probably has momentous implications when it comes to search engine optimization (SEO), but for the time being it falls outside the scope of this Partylite review.
It may surprise you to find this out, but I have never seen Sixteen Candles. When I was in high school, a girl I liked once asked me to watch Sixteen Candles with her, and I agreed on the condition that she would listen to Pink Floyd’s Animals with me. Needless to say, it never happened. She was really cool, and John Hughes has a reputation for loving the Midwest almost as much as I do, but Helen of Troy herself could not make me sit through a romantic comedy unless the event is also an opportunity for me to win over a new Pink Floyd fan. Likewise, I have never seen The Notebook, but none of my exes has ever heard Ummagumma.
Almost the only other movie where the candles have attracted the attention of the blogosphere is Barry Lyndon by Stanley Kubrick. In a previous review on Notebook Crazy, I discussed The Shining and some of the theories surrounding it, and there is an unwritten rule that if a blogger mentions one Stanley Kubrick movie, he has to mention another. You’re either in or you’re out. So here goes.
Barry Lyndon was released in 1975. It is based on a novel by Thackeray, and it takes place in the 18th century, at a time when tensions ran high between do-nothing nobles who had spent most of their inherited money and enterprising upstarts who made up for in cash on hand what they lacked in pedigree. The main character of the movie, Redmond Barry, starts out as a nobody in Ireland. He is such a loser that even his cousin won’t marry him. He enlists in the army and eventually makes his fortune and begins to rub elbows with the rich. He marries a wealthy noblewoman named Lady Lyndon. The main conflict in the movie is the enmity between Barry on the one hand and Lord Bullingdon, Lady Lyndon’s son from her first marriage, on the other. By the end, Barry and Lady Lyndon have become estranged, and in the movie’s last scene, she is seen writing him a check, paying him an allowance to stay out of her sight.
For the most part, Barry Lyndon deserves its reputation as a boring movie. The climactic duel between Barry and Lord Bullingdon is about the only interesting event that happens in the movie’s three hours of running time. But this was partly intentional. Kubrick’s aim was to make the movie look as much like the 18th century as possible. The clothing and props in the movie were accurate replicas of items that Kubrick found in museums. An even more impressive feat than the detail with which the costumes and props were constructed was that Kubrick filmed the movie using only light sources that would have been available in the 18th century.
This meant that all the scenes that take place at night are lit up by candlelight. In order to film these candlelit scenes, Kubrick used a special type of camera lens that had been developed for NASA. Although these lenses were able to film in candlelight, they had other limitations, such as only being able to keep a very small area in focus. I am no expert on cameras, but in researching this Partylite review, I read a very interesting discussion on a forum for Red camera enthusiasts, about the lenses used to film Barry Lyndon, which I encourage you to read. From what I understand, in order for their facial features to appear clearly on film, the actors had to stay in almost the exact same position for the entire scene. Any major movements would mess up the focus. Thus, stillness predominates in the nighttime scenes of Barry Lyndon, further contributing to its reputation as a slow-moving film devoid of action. Another effect of these lenses is that they lack the depth perception of ordinary camera lenses, making the scene look flat.
But Partylite products are candles, not cameras, so this is not the place for further discussion of the lenses used to film Barry Lyndon. (I mean that this Partylite review is not the place for it. The Internet in general, however, is a virtual smorgasbord of discussion of the minutiae of Stanley Kubrick films.) What concerns us here are the candles used in the nighttime scenes in Barry Lyndon. It so happens that there is a blog post on the Neocities Stanley Kubrick site, in which a writer interprets the symbolism of the number of candles in each scene in Barry Lyndon. This writer posits that Kubrick used different numbers of candles as a leitmotif for different characters. Every time Barry meets a new person, that person is in the presence of a candlestick with an increasing number of candles, symbolizing Barry’s social climb. For example, the film shows us Barry meeting Potzdorf, the Prince, an aristocrat, and finally Lady Lyndon. On the table in front of Potzdorf are five candles, while the Prince’s table has six, the aristocrat’s has seven, and Lady Lyndon’s has eight.
But for the purposes of this Partylite review, symbolism is not the most important thing about the candles in Barry Lyndon. Kubrick has a reputation of doing an exhausting number of takes of almost every scene in almost every movie he ever made. When filming nighttime scenes in Barry Lyndon, every time someone flubbed a line or leaned a few inches too far in any direction, the candles had to be blown out and new ones put in place. I assume that this was to avoid continuity errors about how much wax was left on the candles in different parts of the scene. (I am sure that, somewhere on the Internet, there is a feeding frenzy of people reading into slight differences in candle height in Barry Lyndon. I have reached this conclusion because of the sheer volume of virtual ink that has been spilled on the subject of the position of a cigarette in an ashtray in The Shining.) On the set of a Kubrick film, however, even blowing out candles was a big project. Kubrick had candles specially designed for the set of Barry Lyndon. He did not want the candles to go out accidentally, and he wanted to get as much brightness as possible out of a limited amount of wax, not to mention making the actors’ faces visible without burning down the set. Thus, he ordered many thousands of candles, each with three wicks, which meant that it took three times as much breath to blow them out.
The candles in Barry Lyndon are special. In the grand scheme of things, Partylite products are not.
Partylite: The Company and Its Products
One notable aspect of the Partylite business opportunity is that Partylite products. Unlike the three-wicked candles used on the set of Barry Lyndon, some Partylite have one wick, and some have none. Many of the candles are scented. The other notable aspect of the Partylite business opportunity is that it employs a home sales party business model. That means that Partylite distributors are expected to invite guests to their homes and try to convince said guests to buy candles. You don’t need me to tell you why this is a bad idea.
I read the best assessment of the Partylite business opportunity came not from a Partylite review but from a comment on a blog post about the flaws of the MLM business model in general. Bonnie, the author of the comment, described how her friendship with a friend of hers had become strained ever since the friend became a Partylite distributor, she and her daughter are constantly badgering Bonnie to buy Partylite products, to attend parties where Partylite products are sold (barf), to host Partylite parties in her own home (quadruple crown diamond barf), and to enroll as a Partylite distributor. Bonnie now thinks twice before interacting with her former friend in any capacity, because she knows it will turn into an MLM sales and enrollment pitch.
The Partylite Compensation Plan
If, after reading all of the above, you still want to know about the Partylite compensation plan, we have bigger problems than this Partylite review can solve.
Advantages and Disadvantages
- Sometimes I feel like it would be easier to get out of the business of writing an MLM review blog and take top the comments sections of other blogs as a troll instead. Writing this Partylite review just gave me an idea for what my Internet troll name might be. Flat Stanley Kubrick.
- The Partylite business opportunity involves home sales parties. Quadruple crown diamond barf.
- If your friends want scented candles, they can buy them from the dollar store during their lunch break at work. They don’t need to buy them at the prices Partylite distributors want for them, and they certainly don’t have to sit through a party.
Listen, I am not saying that you have to be as exacting as Stanley Kubrick or to reinvent the wheel to the extent that he did in order to be successful in business. You do, however, need to provide a product that no one else has or provide it in a way that is cheaper and more convenient than what your competitors offer. You are not going to find either of those criteria in the Partylite business opportunity. There is a big Internet out there. Keep searching for more original business ideas.
Tina, if you’re out there, my offer still stands to watch Sixteen Candles with you if you will listen to Animals with me. I know it’s a little late, and we now need twice as many candles, but better late than never. To everyone else, my offer still stands to share my expertise on building a successful business online if you schedule a call with me.